June Rewind

waverly hills sanatorium

June has been a month of craziness it seems like. I have worked 90% of the time and tried to have a life and deal with other personal things during that. I have always liked working a lot during the summers because I don’t have school to keep me busy and I can save money to make up for the lack of hours I get during the semester. As of the past week or two, I have been planning to move over to the one-bedroom apartment I have lined up and just trying to get my life more organized.

The beginning of the month seemed to go by so fast because I was working and studying for my PRAXIS II exams all the time. I did end up taking the exams and still don’t have scores for the PLT or Special Education ones, but I got my scores for the Elementary Multi-Subject and I passed them all but science! I was so worried about social studies and I think I may have understudied for science in the process… and the worst part is that I was only four. points. away. So annoyed. Just gotta study harder and retake it in a couple of weeks!

Once the middle of the month hit I got to spend a few days with my nieces and nephews so they came to visit me. It had been a busy semester so I didn’t see them a lot during the start of the year. I love getting the chance to see them and actually do things rather than them just come over and go to sleep then wake up and go home. We went to Mr. Gatti’s and played in the arcade, we played video games, we went swimming, and my oldest nephew even went to the fair with a friend of mine and her son! It was a lot of fun.

This week has been working and packing nonstop. I have procrastinated the packing (like I am currently doing) quite a lot but I think I’ll be able to get it all done in time. I just hate sitting around packing while I have no one to talk to or anything. Feels so weird to be alone in my apartment after always having a roommate but I think I’ll be okay once I’m in a one-bedroom and it’s my one little living space and not having so much empty space, like I do now.

I also got to go to Waverly Hills this month!!! This is a sanatorium in Louisville, Kentucky that is said to be haunted by the patients that once passed away there. It was a tuberculosis hospital for those who were ill back in the early 1900s. The sanatorium was built to house the patients back in 1910 and its doors opened in 1926. There is said to be a “death tunnel” where they would take the bodies of the deceased to be picked up by trains because they could not control the death rate of those contracting the disease.

gargoyle examination tables morgue drawers outside corridor inside corridor death chute death chute outside corridor outside corridor

Things like that are super interesting to me so being able to go was an amazing experience and I can tell you from personal experience… that place definitely has paranormal activity flowing through it. There were many different occurences that happened while my aunt, who is a sensitive. Even if you don’t believe in those things, there was no logical way to explain what happened Friday night.

Overall, June was a pretty good month. Busy as always but I can’t complain too much! How did your month go? Anything exciting happen? Sound off in the comments!

xo Kimberly Signature

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Lost Without You

lost

I’m so lost without you.

lost

This is exactly how I am feeling. It’s been eight months, two weeks, and one day since I last saw you. This emotional rollercoaster of mine is about to derail. I just keep seeing her beautiful face and remembering her comforting voice. It feels so good and so terrifying all at the same time, like the adrenaline you get from going up on that rollercoaster.

After one month, I didn’t know if I’d ever be okay. My world was spiraling and I still tried to pick up my phone to text and call her whenever I needed her. My family would ask if I was okay and I’d just give a fake smile and say, “I’m trying to be.” I can’t express how hard it is to feel this distant from those that I love the move.

After three months, it was her birthday. It was the Christmas celebration without her. It was starting a new year soon, knowing that I would never get to wish her a Happy New Year ever again. I could only hope she was three margaritas deep in afterlife paradise and telling me to, “Smile, baby girl.”

After six months, I felt like maybe it would get easier. I was still depressed and worried and crying a lot, but I didn’t wake up every morning feeling as though it was a bad dream. Realizing it wasn’t just a dream was probably the worst way to deal with the pain. I wanted to forget. I wanted to heal. I wanted her to come back and be by my side. We all know that isn’t possible.

Now, heading towards the ninth month, I don’t know that I feel any better. I feel weak. I feel like I can’t control my own emotions. I never had a handle on them but now it’s just out of control. I try to wake up from this nightmare and I keep getting reminded that it is reality. This is my reality. Without her.

I don’t know that I’ll ever be okay again. They say that there is sacredness in tears. I don’t know how to feel about this. Crying has always made me feel weak, but it’s supposed to make me strong. My tears are supposed to speak, but I hear no words. Tears show that there was once happiness, but I have to wonder… will I ever find that happiness again?

xo Kimberly Signature

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May: Ireland, Birthday, & Life

may recap

I swear I am going to get back into blogging regularly. There has just been so much going on in my life and I can’t believe that it’s already June! It feels like 2017 just started yesterday. My life has been a whirlwind of ups, downs, and turnarounds for months now. May was no exception to this. So much happened during this month! I traveled outside of the country and rode on a plane for the first time, I had my 22nd birthday while IN Ireland, and I’ve had a rollercoaster of emotions going through my head as the month has carried out.

may recap

Ireland: Let me just tell you… if you’ve never been to Ireland, go… right now. Go on online, buy your ticket, and go spend a holiday there. I cannot tell you how amazing this experience was for me. I had so many new things that I got to experience from visiting historical sites to going to pubs to having some fab gelato. I would not trade any of these memories for anything. I also want to to thank my family and friends for all they did to help me prepare for that trip and for wishing me luck and safe travels during my journies. I traveled to Belfast, Galway, Cork, and Dublin while I was there. I will have an entire blog post dedicated to this trip here soon… once I sort through my thousands of pictures.

Birthday: While I was in Ireland, I celebrated my 22nd birthday! Although there was no cake or balloons, just the experience of turning 22 in another country was enough to make it an amazing birthday. Although 22 isn’t an “exciting” birthday for most people, I am determined to make this year my best yet. I am so excited for all the things that my future has in store; I am going on a paranormal overnight tour of Waverly Hills Sanatorium this month, I start student teaching in August, and my pup turns one in November! There is so much to look forward to.

Life: As you may have noticed in my intro, I have had some ups and downs on the emotional front. I have hit some pretty low lows and had hardly any highs at all (no pun intended). Ever since my mom passed away, it feels as if life is not as exciting. Ireland was a huge highlight and has truly uplifted my spirits in many ways. At first, her passing made me realize how precious life is and how important family and friends are, but after awhile, I just kept falling deeper into a depression that I cannot explain. After hitting myself in the head a few times for these awful thoughts, I have now rehashed those feelings of a bright life and bright future. I just hope I can keep on this path of positivity throughout these next few months.

I’d love to hear how you all’s May went. I mean, it had to be brilliant because you all are amazingly fantastic individuals who deserve everything you desire out of life, but who knows… you may have gotten an iguana while I was away! Let me know in the comments below, I miss you all. ❤️

P.S. How come no one told me how amazing tea in the morning is? #justirishthings #actuallyithinkitsaeuropeanthing

xo Kimberly Signature

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Blogmas Day 1 | Happy Birthday, Mom.

happy birthday mom

Although I have not talked about it on my blog, I have mentioned it on my social media. My mom, who was my best friend and my biggest inspiration, passed away on September 21st of this year. She was in surgery in order to better her lifestyle. The surgery went great but something happened in the recovery period and she did not make it. I still do not think I have truly come to terms with this tragedy. The relationship I had with my mom was like no other. She made me feel whole. I could tell her anything and she would answer as a friend and a mom but never held back her feelings about whatever it was. She was truly the ideal mother and all I could have ever wanted in a parent.

Since my birth father was not around for my childhood, she was all I had. She was the mom, the dad, the best friend, the shoulder to cry on, and so much more. We were always really close but once I moved to what I now consider my “hometown”, we became so much closer. She became what I aspired to be as a human being. She was the ideal worker, mother, friend, grandmother, and just perfect. Perfect in my eyes and in so many others. The amount of sadness that has been bestowed upon my life and my loved one’s lives has been massive. She was a huge part of our everyday lives and we are missing a big part of ourselves without her.

Today is her birthday. She would have been 47 years old today. She was so young, so gentle, and so kind. She had so much left to live for. She was about to graduate with a Bachelors in Business Administration, she was going to begin her ultimate weight loss surgery and live a healthier lifestyle, and she was going to do things that she always dreamed of! I was and still am so proud of her progress before she passed.

Some people say that “dwelling” on someone passing away is not healthy. Although I do get very upset when I realize I can’t call my mom and tell her I love her or complain about how much homework I have, I don’t consider my talking of her in this way dwelling on her being gone. I consider it admiring her life. She was the epitome of perfect in my eyes and, although there were many things she wanted to change, I love her just the way she was. She made life worth living and a smile worth showing.

I cannot explain how lost I feel without her, but she deserves to know, all the way up there, that we all are still thinking about her. We’re going to celebrate her birthday as if she never left us and hope she’ll stop by for a visit during the party. ❤️

I love you, Momma. I miss you so much.

R.I.P. Christina Anne Muso
December 1st, 1968 – September 21st, 2016

xo Kimberly Signature

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Things to Include in Your Planner/Bullet Journal

Things to Include in Your Planner/Bullet Journal

Bullet journaling has been all the rage here lately. You see tons of blog posts, videos, and more about it but you still see the classic “Plan With Me” posts/videos as well. I personally still use a planner and plan to upgrade next August when I need a new one–duh, you know I’m getting an Erin Condren… as a celebration of my student teaching! Anyway, there are tons of things that you could include in your planner or bullet journal that many people do not think of. I love to plan my entire life so there are plenty of things in here that I want to incorporate into my own planner in time (got to get the perfect system down). Most of these ideas have been gathered over time from other blogs, Pinterest pins, etc. Let’s get started!

Personal

  • Monthly/Yearly Goals
  • Daily/Monthly Habit Tracker
  • Wish List
  • Daily Gratitude
  • Positive/Inspirational Quotes
  • Daily Reflections/Journal Entries
  • Relaxation Guide
  • Life Challenges
  • Mood Tracker
  • Monthly/Yearly Achievements

School

  • Assignment Planner
  • Class Schedule
  • Grade Tracker
  • Professor Contact Information

Business

  • Blog Stats Tracker
  • Social Media Following
  • Income Tracker
  • Side-Job Information
  • Expenses Tracker

Technology

  • Username/Password Record
  • Shopping Websites by Category

House/Finances

  • Cleaning Schedule
  • Spending Tracker
  • Gas Log
  • Credit Card Log
  • Add to Savings Tracker
  • $5 a Day Savings Plan
  • House Repair/Maintenance Log
  • Bill Tracking
  • Debt/Loan Tracker
  • Vehicle Information
  • Important Contacts
  • Go-To Recipes

Family

  • List of Birthdays/Anniversaries
  • Meal Planning
  • Pregnancy Planner/Tracker
  • Trip Packing List
  • Gift Ideas
  • Master Grocery List

Health/Wellness

  • Appointment Logs
  • Medicine/Refill Tracker
  • Step Tracker
  • Daily Water Intake Tracker
  • Illness Tracker
  • Essential Oil Blends
  • Women Tracker
  • Weight Loss Tracker
  • Exercise List/Tracker
  • Food Log
  • Body/Size Measurements

Miscellaneous

  • Daily/Monthly To-Do Lists
  • Books to Read
  • TV Show Tracker
  • Places to Travel/Places Been
  • Movies to Watch
  • Project Planner Pages
  • Daily Weather
  • Music Playlists
  • Sale Tracker

xo Kimberly Signature

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